Finding out that your husband had an affair is an incredibly painful and traumatic experience that will leave you spiraling and wondering “now what?” You feel like you’re living in a nightmare that you can’t wake up from.
My husband had an affair, NOW WHAT?!
I wish I had some better news, but the hard truth is, there’s no easy way to get through your husband’s affair. You’ve been thrusted into hell, and the only way is through. It’s going to be a long and messy healing journey that will test your strength and resilience.
You’re going to make it through this, I promise.
Here are five tips to help you after your husband had an affair
Take it One Day at a Time
The first thing you need to do is get through each day. Take it one day at a time, and focus on surviving each day. Some days will be easier than others, and that’s okay. When the pain feels overwhelming, remember to take deep breaths and remind yourself that you can make it through this.
Trust yourself. You’re the only one who can make the decision about what to do with your marriage. Friends and family may offer their opinions, but ultimately, it’s your decision. Listen to your heart, and try not to make any lasting decisions about your marriage until the dust settles.
Find Professional Support
Remember, you’re not alone. I recommend getting yourself into professional counseling where you can begin to process in a safe environment. One tip when doing your research, look for a therapist with your family values. If you’re thinking you may want to save your marriage, you’ll want a therapist who’s going to support you. Otherwise, she may give you advise that goes against your desires or values.
Join my free support group, Healing Your Marriage | After His Affair, where you can connect with other women who are going through similar experiences. Having a community of people who understand what you’re going through can make a huge difference.
Word of caution. Limit how much you talk to your family and friends about the affair. As much as their support helps you make it through the day, they may not always agree with the decisions you make moving forward. Sharing the details will also cause them pain. If your marriage is reconciled, the wounds they carry can last a lifetime and can negatively affect your relationship with them in the long run. I recommend sparing them the unnecessary pain, and find a professional to talk to.
Take Care of Yourself
Finally, be gentle with yourself. This is a painful and traumatic experience, and it’s okay to feel a wide range of emotions. Take care of yourself physically and emotionally, and know that it’s okay to take a long time to heal.
If you’re interested in learning more about how to begin the healing process, consider checking out my coaching membership group that can provide you with the tools to deal with the emotional rollercoaster and begin to move forward. Remember, you’re strong and beautiful, and you will get through this one day at a time.