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Chai with Charity #4: Fight!

We all dream of our happily ever after.

From the time we are tiny children until the day we die, we long to be loved truly, madly, deeply.

You spend your days seeking out your one true love, the one who completes you.  You find the one who makes you laugh, who makes you feel beautiful, who makes you feel like you belong, and no one else even compares.

You say I do.  And you believe all your dreams are about to come true.

Then comes

Life,

Debt,

Children,

Disappointments, and

The Daily Mundane.

You do your best to hold on, to love, but one day you wake up to your worst nightmare:

Your spouse is having an affair.

How could this be possible? How could someone you love so deeply betray you? Betray your children? How could someone you’ve trusted with your heart stab it with a knife and leave you in a puddle of blood?

You were promised to be held, for better and for worse, you were promised until death do us part.

Only you’re still alive, and your other half has found someone else to hold.

Your pain is excruciating, and those who love you are broken for you.  Where do you go from here?  How do you carry on with a wounded heart and a broken dream? You listen to the voices around you, and they’re telling you to get out, save yourself.  You know you don’t deserve this betrayal, but there’s a voice whispering inside you,

Maybe it doesn’t have to be over. Maybe there’s a chance we can make it through this.  Maybe I’m not ready to give up on my marriage just yet.

So, who do you listen to?  What’s the right thing to do?

I’m here to tell you it’s ok to listen to that voice inside, and trust yourself.  It’s ok to stay.  It’s ok, to stand up and say I’m giving us a fighting chance.

It doesn’t matter why you choose to stay.  Maybe you choose to stay, because you’re afraid to leave.  Maybe it’s because you’re afraid of hurting your children.  Maybe you love someone who’s lost and you’re willing to stay until he’s found.

Whatever the reason, choose love. Fight for love.  It may get worse before it gets better, but still fight.

Just like Love chose you, fought for you.

Fight.

You’ll be glad you did.

I promise.

8 thoughts on “Chai with Charity #4: Fight!

  1. Amber says:

    Charity remind people you aren’t the only one who stayed and fought! There are more of us! I love that there is someone who understands why I didn’t give up! Thank you for being brave and telling your story! Love you guys.

  2. Jaime says:

    My grandmother chose to stay and fight. They had a long, happy marriage. When my son was regressing into autism, our marriage just about went down the drain. I was fixing our son, my husband worked very long hours to avoid being home. A very nice coworker (woman) became close to him. I saw red flags and we worked it out. Nothing happened, but I could see how it *could have. God bless you for sharing.

  3. Jen says:

    i just love these! I’m so glad you decided to do this. And you are inspiring me to get back into the vlogging game 🙂

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